Miscarriage Supports

The emotional and psychological impact of miscarriage can be debilitating. This page aims to provide an overview of the types of support available for individuals experiencing miscarriage.

Sinead’s story:

We started trying for number 3 in January 2020. I had gotten pregnant very quickly with my first and then our second…. so when February & March rolled past, I started to feel nervous. Covid lockdown had just begun, but we figured that wouldn’t last too long. We found out we were pregnant in April and we were both thrilled! Everything was absolutely grand, until it wasn’t. My husband was in the office and I was at home with our then 8 and 2 year old. Life was manic as I tried to work and keep them entertained all day. 

One afternoon in May, I was about 5 weeks pregnant, and went to the toilet to see what no one wants to see when they are pregnant. I phoned the maternity hospital to be told “ah sure you’re barely pregnant/it might have been a false positive”. I urged them to let me go and be checked so that evening, on my own, I had a scan. They couldn’t see anything on the abdominal scan, so I was told to come back in a week. I spent the week losing my pregnancy and a scan a week later, a little embryo could be seen. I had to have a D&C, all on my own (thanks covid) and back home to normal life. 

We then started trying again immediate and to my sheer joy, we found out we were pregnant again in July 2020. I had no cycle in between so had no idea how far along I was, but I figured early stages. I booked an early private scan for 7 weeks. All seemed to be going well, and I arrived on the day feeling positive. My husband still wasn’t allowed in, but surely this time it would be grand? To my utter disbelief, as the sonographer swiped the dophler over my tummy, there was no little nugget in my womb. No sign of any teeny tiny heartbeat, nothing. I had done so many tests, and they all progressed as normal, so where was my baby? 

A trip in to the maternity hospital again suggested a molar pregnancy, or ectopic…. All words I knew nothing about. The internal scan went on forever. They took bloods and then 2 days later back in for more. I was then admitted because my HCG levels were rising slowly. 3 days of waiting around, I was finally brought in for surgery. They found our little one in my left tube, and it had just ruptured. I lost my baby and my left tube that day. 

We were advised to wait a cycle before we started trying again, so we did what we were told and to our disbelief, saw those 2 red lines once again in October 2020. Everything was once again going perfectly, with my husband Michael by my side for scans. We had 3/4 scans in those early weeks to check progression. I had a scan at 9 weeks and our little “Greenbean” was doing amazingly, good strong heartbeat. Just a couple of days later, I felt different. Couldn’t put my finger on it, I just felt off. I rang the hospital once again and they put it down to pregnancy anxiety from recurrent miscarriages, but told me they wouldn’t turn me away if I went in. Michael, however had to stay at home. 

I lay on that bed that day and my gut was telling me to expect the worst. An abdominal scan was done, and the second the sonographer said she needed to take a better look with an internal, that was all the confirmation I needed. Greenbean was gone. Weeks past and we found out our little Greenbean was a little boy, and he had Trisomy 21, also known as Down Syndrome. I so wish we had gotten to meet him, he would have been so loved! 

I was done at that point, creeping closer to 40 and decided I was so happy with my lot, but Michael persuaded me to give it one last try, so we did and in the meantime started “spark a life” (that’s a whole other story). We lit a candle every night and we hoped and hoped and hoped. We sparked a little life in April 2021 and he was the one who stuck! We welcomed our little man on the 13th of December 2021 and he completed our little family more than anyone will ever really know! 

So please don’t give up hope, because at the end of the day, sometimes it’s all you have left x

Below are some links we hope you find helpful if you are on this journey:

https://miscarriage.ie/https://feileacain.ie/

https://www.alittlelifetime.ie

https://pregnancyandinfantloss.ie/support-links/

https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/birth-family-relationships/miscarriage-and-stillbirth/bereavement-and-childbirth/

https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/birth-family-relationships/miscarriage-and-stillbirth/bereavement-and-childbirth/

Facebook pages:

facebook.com/groups/brayopenforum/posts/2671941799671319/